Doctor Who Proms 2013

January 6th, 2014

Got an hour and thirteen minutes? Watch this now available on YouTube.


I am also trying out the embed code feature. I want the second post in the newly remodeled blog to be a video post. Please try out the new comment area. You will have to be a Facebook member to comment.

Spammers begone! This blog is DEFENDED!

WP Upgraded And Comments Are Facebook Only!

January 5th, 2014

I have upgraded MTL WordPress Blog to version 3.8. Admin interface is excellent.

This started with a need to change the comment area to something more secure and tied to Facebook. I had comments in moderation for the past year. Sorry spammers! Your typing and posting has been in vain and has led to a tighter comment policy managed the smart way with apps.

I found a plugin that replaces standard WordPress comments with Facebook comments. That will help to keep the spam away and perhaps encourage comments by those actually interested in the posts. (And not just to score a few SEO points.)

The first part was to upgrade WordPress. Once logged in and I see that my FTP copy method worked great, I found the plugin and have installed it. Next I need to create a Facebook app to manage the comment area. I don’t expect the comments below to attach to my Facebook page as that has not been specified yet.

Here’s a link to the Facebook comments plug in page in case you want to have this for your blog. (And you can keep those pesky spammers away from your blog and website.)

If you are interested in being a blog writer, please let me know and what type of posts you most want to write. It might simply be sharing videos and photos of your convention and DW celebrity meeting experience.

Set To Login To Post A Comment

April 23rd, 2013

I am trying to upgrade WordPress, but it’s too late in the evening and complicated to try this and with the instructions I am reading not all correlating. (Do I delete these directories or not. And FTP won’t let me delete whole directories anyway.)

I have the 3.51 version. And I see a “Profiles” directory on my host that I have no idea what that is.

Anyone familiar with WordPress? The initial installation was by a click. I was able to import the old web version into it. Upgrade looks more complicated.

Once I turned off the spam filter the posts started coming in. Now they must login to post.

Sorry spammers. This blog is defended!

Milwaukee Time Lords Website Stats

January 12th, 2012

Want to know how our site is ranking? Here’s what has to say about our club’s website. (new window)


Estimated Worth: $95
Daily Unique Visitors: 8
Daily Earning: $.05

You can find out more about our site, including where it is hosted, whois information, search engine rankings, directory listings and website age (10 years, 56 days).

Take a look at other websites. Enter yours if you have one.

You can use this information to help improve your site’s rank and show to others who need this information for advertising and link placement.

Build a Tardis for Your Cat

September 20th, 2011

Do you have a cat that needs something more than just a plain and simple cat tree? Do you love Dr. Who and wouldn’t mind there being a Tardis in the house?

Here’s the solution:

As an aside as I was searching for the original source of this story in hopes of finding building plans, I found this “Wikia” page for cats found in Doctor Who.

All Posts Pass Through Auto-Moderation

August 17th, 2010

I have just deleted thousands of posts marked as ‘spam’. If you post here to sell stuff and it includes links, it is highly likely to be trapped in a spam filter and no one will ever see it.

A few posts are held for manual moderation. If the posts have nothing to do with the topic (most are old articles, so I don’t expect much activity), they will not be approved and so the post is a waste of time.

WordPress is much smarter than other blogs that you may use to post your ads.

Here’s an angle to try: get a Facebook account and buy ad spots.

As the Doctor might say “our blog is defended”.


March 1st, 2010

Jay Badenhoop is Professor of Chemistry at Potomac State College at West Virginia University, located in Keyser, WV. Jay also teaches astronomy. Jay has been sending to our members these real samples of student answers for the past year. “And the Doctor hangs his head in shame”.

This is his latest batch:

These are actual answers given by students on homework and exams. I swear I couldn’t make up ones this good. As usual, my comments to myself are in brackets.

A problem with reflecting telescopes is you need light pointed at the mirror in order to see so if you block out this light with your big head you won’t be able to see anything.

Q:Which types of light in the electromagnetic spectrum are mostly blocked from reaching the Earth’s surface by the atmosphere?

A:Radiation is blocked from entering Earth’s atmosphere. [It is? D'oh!]

A:The Earth has windows in the atmosphere that lets some kinds of light in.

[Only if the windows have curtains.]

Q:Which types of light in the electromagnetic spectrum are mostly blocked from reaching the Earth’s surface by the atmosphere?

A:X-rays, Y-rays, and Z-rays.

[But A-rays through W-rays get through. Everyone knows S-rays cause sunburn and C-rays cause cancer. Correct answer: Light with short wavelengths is blocked - ultraviolet light, X-rays, and gamma rays (the student confused the Greek letter gammag with "Y"). There is no "Z-ray" but there is a "Z particle".It's not as funny when there's an explanation, is it?]

Q:How is this light blocked?

A:Light can become blocked by solids, like plastics and metals.

[There are big chunks of plastic and metal floating up in the atmosphere?There must be more mid-air plane crashes than I thought.]

spectral lines – Black lines that papaer in the light spectrum.

[Appear? Paper? Sorry, I don't do anagrams.]

The wavelength is measured in centiminters.

[*I* measure wavelength in pepperminters!]

The wavelength is a symbol that looks like a “V” with a tail on top.

[The symbol is lambda (l).Come to think of it, it *does* look like a "V" with a tail on top...]

wavelength – the distance between the climax of one wave to the climax of the next wave.

[If your mind is warped, you might read something naughty into this. The student meant "crest" of the wave.]

frequency – amount of waves in a given time to pass through a rigid fixed unit. [Now just a minute.You're thinking something naughty again, aren't you?]

Q:Planets radiate most of their light in the infrared.Why are they visible to humans in the night sky?

A:Planets are made of warm colors, which are the coolest, which will stand out against the dark night sky with stars mostly being in the cool colors, which are the warmest.


Reflecting teleoscopes are different from refracting telloscopes because they have mirorrs that reflect incomming light. [Will you *please* use spell-check already!]

light pollution – happens when an area has too much civilization.

[true - I just like the way he said it.]

light pollution – What causes astronomers to move their telescopes to an abandoned area. [You can only see the night sky if all the other people have moved away.]

light pollution – Astronomers have to fight with states, cities, electrical companies, towns, architects, ect, in order to limit the amount of light. [This means war!]

The similarities between a refracting and reflecting telescope are slim to none.

Another advantage of the Hubble Space Telescope is that it is literally in space already so it’s a lot easier to look at space.

The frequency of infrared light sits just below red light.

[My mother's Christmas decorations sit just below the red light.]

Ultraviolent light is called that because it is violent against your skin.

Radiation comes from stars in the throws of death that explode and give off comic rays.

[Stars throw pies in your face?Also known as "Three Stooges rays".]

focal length – A distance of infinity objects from their images. Astronomical objects are so far away they might as well be at infinity.

[And your grade is so low, it might as well be zero.]

right ascension – also known as RA. [And...?]

Q:List the circumpolar constellations. [ones that circle the North Star]

A:Ursa Major, Ursa Minor, Cepheus, Draco, Cassiopeia, Corona Borealis, and Scrotum.

[Yes, right, yes, right, yes, okay. wait - what was that last one? The name is "Scutum" which means "shield", but sounds almost as naughty. It only has *two stars*, so how anyone saw a Roman shield, or any shape for that matter, is beyond me.]

Q:Can you conclude that because the stars in a constellation appear close together in the sky, that they are at nearly the same distance from Earth?

A:No, because we really know nothing.

[Perhaps *you * don't.I think *we* know a little more than nothing about stars.]

Q: Why do stars observed close to the horizon twinkle more than those overhead?

A: They are more different from their surroundings.[huh?]

vernal equinox – the date when the sun crosses the o boundary moving northward.

[The sun only crosses the o'boundary over Ireland. I have no idea what the student intended. The sun crosses the *celestial equator*.]

vernal equinox – point where the sun crosses the eclipstic going south to north.

[You put on eclipstick when you and your date go out to watch a solar eclipse. Eclipstick only comes in one color - black. The word is "ecliptic" which is the Sun's path relative to the stars. Since the Sun can't cross its own path, the student's definition is bogus even if you correct the spelling error.]

Earth’s core – center composed of nickel-iron alloy, one of the less hot stars in the solar system. [Earth is a star? There is a star at the center of the Earth?I think this student probably was distracted in the middle of writing this sentence.]

Continential drift is when the continence slide across the Earth’s surface, explained as a set of shifting regions called tectonic planets. [The other planets slide against the Earth?

Their relationship must be more than gravitational, nudge nudge say no more!And when continents move, does it cause incontinence?]

My answer to global warming is to create cleaner artificial clouds and take out the polluted particles, but create polluted clouds, through making a cleaner environment.

[Huh? Who you gonna call? Cloudbusters!]

Q:Describe the layers to Earth’s atmosphere. Which layer(s) contain(s) ozone?

A:The Earth’s ozone lies within the Inner Solid Core. Then there is the Outer Molten Core, which is made up of molten hot magma. Then there is the D layer. Then there is the Lower Mantel, Mesosphere, and Lithosphere.

[There is ozone at the center of the Earth and molten hot magma in the air? Obviously this student skipped over the word *atmosphere*.]

The temperature of the atmosphere decreases with attitude.

[Yeah, the atmosphere's a real bitch when it's cold.]

libration – a swinging motion, real or not, of the moon.

[It don't mean a thing, if it ain't got that swing! Doo-wop doo-wop! Libration is the apparent rocking motion of the Moon (when you look at time-lapse photography) caused when the Moon moves faster when closer to Earth and slower when farther away but it remains rotating at the same rate.]

sidereal month – month of days for the Moon to orbit counted in sidereals.

[Wasn't "Frankie and the Sidereals" a '50's pop group that recorded "Fly Me to the Moon"?]

crater – a simple bowl on the moon of 15 kilometers diameters.

[All craters are the same size and are used to eat giant cereal. The constitution says all men are cratered equal.]

crater – Very large hole in the ground.

[Pesky moon gophers!]

Q:Why is an astronaut’s weight standing on the Moon only 1/6th the weight he had on Earth?

A:His relationship to the moon would be greater than his relationship to the Earth.

[What kind of relationship? Do they get married or just fool around?]

Q:What were some weaknesses of the lunar module?

A:You could run out of full very quickly.

[How can you run out if it's full?]

Q:What causes the blackout in communications during re-entry?

A:The extremely high temperatures fad the communications with mission control.

[Don't worry; it's just a passing fad.]

Moon landing hoaxers believe that the spacecraft would have disincarnated upon entering the moon surface. [No, it would have been reincarnated as a toaster.]

The Apollo missions could not of been fake. A conspiracy of that magnet tide to been done is almost impossible. [Yeah, it would have taken a lot of really *big* magnets.]

All crediblitty for everyone against the Moon landing because they used an ample amount of rhettoric and fallacies in order to persuade you of their views, not to inform you what so ever.

[Rhettoric is what Rhett Butler uses in "Gone With the Wind". You don't believe in the moon landings?Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.]

One strange happening during the Apollo 11 mission was sightings of strange injects floating around the spacecraft.

[That's what happens when you shoot up cocaine in space.]

When astronauts first arrived in space the seen something in the distance but was really afraid to say anything to mission control because they did not want to be thought of as guys who seen aliens when they arrived back at earth.

[It wasn't aliens, it was the cocaine.]

Three days into space, the command center missed a message from the astronauts wanting to know where the hell they were at.

[Maybe the mission control guys were high on crack, too. Tune in next week for more "Sordid Secrets of the Space Program".]

Student Malachemism #7

December 16th, 2009

Didn’t get enough of that last post. Here’s more! The Doctor would be ashamed of these students! (Or how NOT to qualify for the role of the Doctor’s assistant.)


Here is another set of actual quotes from chemistry student exams, homework, and lab reports. [Again, my comments to myself are in brackets.]


Q: Give the name for the following elements:
   V (vanadium)
vanilla         [Sorry, not an element.]
vitamin       [Are you joking?]
valium        [The calming element.]
vanium       [They make vans out of it.]
venerium    [Gives you a sexually transmitted disease.]


   Sn (tin)
sandium     [What sand is made of.]
standous    [Element that never sits down.]
sinium        [The evil element.]


   Si (silicon)
sillium        [The silly element.]
silicious     [It's delicious!]

Rubbing alcohol is used as a tropical antisceptic.
[No, the tropical antiseptic is rum.  Have enough and you won't feel a thing.]

The specific heat of a substance is how many jewels it takes to heat the substance. 

[Diamonds are a substance's best friend.  That's *Joules*, a unit of heat.]


Q:  How do you make a supersaturated solution?
A:  You make a supersonic solution by adding too much solid to the solvent

but be careful it can be broken easily.
[You heat the solution, dissolve more solid, then cool slowly.]


Q:  What is the specific heat of a substance?
A:  It’s the value that I used in the equation.  [What equation?]
A: The total amount of heat in a sub.  [They toast subs at Subway now.]


The sample is irradiated with UZ light.  [From the Wizard of Uz? 

Does UZ stand for "ultrazippy"?]


The liquid mixture is poured into a separatory funnel and the querulous layer drained out.
[I had to think about this one.  "Querulous" means "peevish; frequently expressing a
complaint or grievance".  In all of my years of teaching chemistry, I have never had a chemical solution complain.  The word is *aqueous* layer, which means a water solution.]


The percent yeild was less than 100% because the equation didn’t react.


The unknown liquid was not very density.


Q:  Why was salt added to the solution?
A:  It makes it more possible for water more accurately.  [huh?]


Add 20 mL of a statuated sodium chloride solution.
[Statuated?  Made into a statue?  That's *saturated*.]


The fumes in this lab were very fowl smelling.  [Smelled like chicken?]


Turpentine did not dissolve in the water because they were not combatable.
[Pacifists never dissolve.  *compatible*]


When the cap is removed from the soda, you release all the Co2 crammed into the soda. 

[Cobalt squared?  That's *CO2*.]


Q:  Name three solutions found in your home.
A:  Blecch tea and Liquid Plummer.
[Really bad tea and Christopher Plummer?  Do you mean bleach?]


Q:  When a solution forms, where do the ions or molecules of solute go?
A:  They make new molecules.

[They get pregnant and have baby molecules?]
A:  When you dissolve something, the molecules of water are pulled apart.
[Hulk smash water molecules!]
A:  They go into the air.  [They escape?]
[Answer: They go between the molecules of solvent.]


The solution will seperate into layers if left idol.  [American Idol?]


The solution is hearted until it comes to a boil.  [All you need is love.]


Q:  Suppose you had a 10% salt solution.  How could you increase the percentage to 12% without adding more salt?
A:  Place the salt into less water.
[Hmm, travel back in time and decide to use less water in the first place.  That's a
unique answer.  Answer: Evaporate some of the solvent until concentration is 12%.]


Q:  A lollipop left around for a while becomes sticky.  Why does this happen?
A:  It becomes unbalanced.
[No, children who eat too much candy get a sugar rush and become unbalanced.
Answer:  The lollipop is a supersaturated solution (more solute than is normally stable) and when exposed to water, the unstable structure begins to break down.]


Melting is a change of state of matter solid to liquid by adding heast.
[Is that heat or yeast?]


Fish donut remove the oxygen atoms from H2O.  [Fish eat donuts?]


Students wrote papers based on an American Chemical Society talk “Molecules to Mozzerella: The Chemistry of Cheese”:


Cheese making is a long process.  First you have the cow.
[You have to give birth to the cow yourself?  No wonder it takes so long.  Actually,
first primitive organisms had to evolve for millions of years into mammals to make the cow.  The process takes even longer than you thought.]


Milk is pasturized so all the unwanted bacteria are killed of.
[Killed of what?  The milk is put out to pasture?]


The presentation started by the speaker having a cow.
[Bart Simpson: "Don't have a cow, man."  He showed a picture of a cow.]


The circumstances involving the cow are far from simplistic.
[What trouble's old Bessie got herself into now?]


The agging room is where cheese is put to age.

[I want to know where the *youthing* room is.]


Cheese making endures some meticulous but ends with time consuming steps to induce a flavored delight.  [huh?]


The perception of cheese as a large produced food is somewhat unapparent but should be appreciated as a form of art.  [Cheese sculptures?]


The smell of the cheese can be measured with a gastromeatograph.
[Cheese contains meat?  That's a *gas chromatograph* which separates
and measures the amounts of different gases in a vapor mixture.]


A soft cheese known as Kamelbear cheese smells like stinky feet.
[That's what you get when you cross a camel with a bear.  *Camembert*]


The pie curd is mixed in stainless steal bowls.
[The bowls are stolen?  There is a lemon curd pie and a cheesecake, but what is pie curd?]


The speaker informed us that it is impossible to make cheese from human breast milk.  Otherwise there would be many hungry babies.
[Am I the only one who finds that a bit creepy?]


Starter cultures play an important roll in the production of cheese.
[Cheese tastes good on rolls.]


Some semi-soft cheeses are mold ripened like stilton or rotford.
[Yes, mold leads to rot, but the name is *Roquefort*.]


The speaker’s intention was to impact into us the process of cheesemaking.
[He had a powerful left hook.  Pow! Whack! Cheddar!]


If Swiss cheese is made to quickly it will explode.
[Used by all the best cheese suicide bombers.]


The block of cheese is cut into peaces.
[And that's how the Great Cheese War ended.]


Student Chemisms #6

December 16th, 2009

Once again Milwaukee Time Lords member, Jay Badenhoop presents us with more real samples of student answers to science questions. I include everything in Jay’s email to me, including the amusing disclaimer.

Here is another set of actual quotes from chemistry student exams, homework, and lab reports.

These are presented anonymously so no students were embarrassed (though maybe they should be).

[Again, my thoughts to myself are in brackets.]


On a 3-D molecular model-building exercise:

There is a symmetry plane between the center carbon atom.  [Do you know what "between" means?]


Q: When you change to the other chair conformation [of dichlorocyclohexane], are the chlorine atoms now axial or equatorial?
A: They’re trans.  [That wasn't one of the choices!]
Q: Now move one chlorine atom from carbon 2 to carbon 3.  Are the chlorines cis or trans?
A: They’re axial.  [D'oh!]
[On his tax forms, where it says "married, divorced, or single?", he answers "yes".
On my tax forms I select the option "Married filing double jointed, nudge nudge say no more!".]


Do not get benzoic acid in your eyes or it will cause digestive track irritation.  [Did you swallow your eyes?]


Inhaling benzoic acid may cause respiratory tract infection.  [No, it is a powder, not a bacterium.]


Insert the sample tube into the hating element.  [Make love not hate.]


        Part C: Indentation of an Unknown Solid.  [It is already indented - see?]


There was a lot of error due to missing the begging and end of the melting range.

[If the melting range begs, they put it out of its misery.  Don't miss it!]


The appartus was too slow and drug out the whole experiment.  [Maybe it was high.]


We will find the solubility of a coefficient in water.  [A coefficient is a number.  You mean you can dissolve numbers in water?  I think you mean "find the solubility coefficient".]


The mixture is shaked.   [No.]
The mixture is shook.    [No, try again.]
The mixture is shooked.  [No.]
The mixture is shooken.  [Still no.]
The mixture is shucken.  [Nope, you're getting colder.]
The mixture is shucked.  [No, you shuck corn, not mixtures.]
The mixture is shaken.   [Finally one person got it right!]
[Das Mischung ist geschücken, yavoll, mein Herr!]


Make sure you open the top between shakies or it might explode.  [Jinkies!]


You have to open the bottom because the pressure in the mixture has to relieve itself.


The benzoic acid was not quit pure enough.  [You shouldn't quit.]


My melting point was too high.  It must of been my equipptment.  [Or your spelling.]


The layers were easy and easy to see.  [Yeah, feelin' easy...]


Q: Why should you not use a bunsen burner to evaporate ether from the benzoic acid solution?
A: The flame could ignite the ethanol.  [Last time I checked, ether and ethanol were two different substances.]
A: Because it would burn the benzoic acid down.  [The big bad wolf burned it down.]
[Real answer: The ether is highly flammable!]


If you overheat the solution, something bad will happen.

[Can you be any more vague?  You'll upset the karma of the universe, man.]


Q: What could cause the recovery of benzoic acid to be less than 100%?
A: A mistake.  [You mean like taking this class?]
A: Some could have been lost when it was put on a watchglass and kept in my drawer.
[Alakazam, benzoic acid vanished!  It's magic!  Maybe the drawer has a trap drawer.]


The density of the object is its density.  [I yam what I yam.  Master of the obvious.]


The density is less dense than the density it is floating in.  [Huh?]


Water always has a density of 1 even if you have a lake.  [But not if you have a pond?]


Density is all ways constant.  [No, some times it deep ends on temperature.]


A psychometer is used to measure density.
[No, a *pycnometer* is used to measure density; a *psychometer* is used to measure insanity.]


It doesnt mater how much watter you put in the graduated cylinder.  [The t wandered.]


A 50 mL sample of ether is wadded to the funnel.  [Like a wad of cotton? added?]


I measured the volumn of the column.


Q: Why does a steel bar sink, but a steel ship floats?
A: Because the ship is on the ocean.  If you take a cruise, you feel happy and more buoyant
so the ship floats.


The release of clouroflourocarbons caused depletion of the ozone lawyer.  [Ozone lawyers only take cases in the upper atmosphere.  We already have too many lawyers; it wouldn't hurt to deplete a few.  Clouroflourocarbons are baked with flour and "clour"?  It's spelled



Global warming causes floods and droughts that kill everything in it’s awake.

[Then go back to sleep.  It was all a bad dream.]


The media creates excitements and false postulations from the population.

[I thought you get false postulations from a bad pregnancy test.]


The media sometimes uses only a portion of the data witch gives erroneous results.

[And it uses witchcraft to make up the rest.]


If we reverse global warming, then we’d have global cooling and the media would thrive on stories about that.  [Sad but probably true.  Students sure don't trust the media.]


We humans have put a dent in the plant life on earth.

[Don't worry, we have auto insurance for that.]


Global warming will raze the water level of the earth.

[Don't worry, we can use a razor to shave it down again.]


If we don’t do something about global warming, it will have a snowball effect.

[Don't worry, the snowballs will make it cooler.]


Jay Badenhoop


No trees were killed in the sending of this message.
However, a large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced.

Milwaukee Time Lords Anniversary Dinner Slide Show

October 5th, 2009

Our member and current Vice President of the Milwaukee Time Lords, Carl Féthière, has created a video of images taken at our 20th Anniversary Dinner, which was held August 15th, 2009. This is our first club YouTube post. You can help out by joining YouTube and posting a comment.